It was a slow start and that means people drink more. I've long had a theory that bartenders can only make so many drinks per hour. With fewer people they tend to drink more. What this implies is bad or slow service is the only thing keeping people sober.
Aunt B was there all night. On my side, when it is slow I can never get ahead. When it is busy I have more time to pull discs but tonight. My general rule on sign ups is that if you are too drunk to fill out a slip, you're too drunk to get on stage. Tonight that was over ruled by aunt B to great crapaoke suck-sess. The girl in question was so drunk, she left before her turn came up. Then came back and demanded to know when he turn was. Then barged on stage when some neophyte singers were doing a duet. Finally I got her off stage and got her song on the next turn. It was comic relief at least.
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Sent from my Verizon Wireless Samsung SCH-U740 device.
Tuesday
Monday
Tomorrow is the crappaoke
I actually enjoy it and look forward to it. I have not met my counterpart as of yet. But we'll see. This post is primarily to work out the kinks in the new theme. Planner.
- Papa's got a brand new Splat
- Papa's got a brand new Splat
Sunday
A classic from the Bar Bitch
Dear everyone who has or shall act like an ass to an employee of any
establishment:
Without any preamble or unnecessary set up to drive my point, I shall
merely begin with this: you, the customer, are in a very precarious
and potentially unhealthy or unpleasant situation waiting to happen.
You see, waiters and bartenders have access to the food and beverages
that you will place into you mouth and allow passage to your gullet.
Retail employees have access to your personal financial information
when you hand them your credit card. Parking lot attendants may watch
over your car just as easily as turning a blind eye. Bank tellers
handle your paycheck and bills and nest eggs. I could go, but i think
I've made my point here.
There is no solidarity among the working class, so just because -for
example-you are a server who goes out to be waited on by another
server this does not mean all is forgiven when you act like a
pretentious and overbearing shit. more than likely, this means you
will either be given visine in your cocktail or -and this is my
favorite- a used or dirty straw. the best revenge after all, is a
subtle and secret revenge.
dear customers worldwide, we bring you your food. your drinks. you
voluntarily give us access to your digestive and immune systems on a
weekly basis and if you think we are unaware of this power, then think
again. Do not believe that a sturdy and pious moral fiber prevents a
serving class individual from exacting a type of payback upon you for
grievous errors in manners and social etiquette. this is not 1758;
there is no such thing as a loyal servant.
one serving job is much like another and therefore we are all at any
given time willing to risk losing the current job in lieu of
physically harming a customer who has crossed the line and for
example: has sexually assaulted us or threatened our lives or just
generally pissed us off. as an aside to kronick: tell me who this guy
PJ is and I'll make sure he drinks smoker's loogies for a long while.
in summation...be nice to your server or checkout person or launderer.
say please and thank you to your gas pump attendant or your hair
stylist or your karaoke coordinator. you'll never know when we've
licked our finger and stuck it in your rib eye or around the rim of
your martini UNLESS you can be certain that you haven't pissed us off.
thank you.
establishment:
Without any preamble or unnecessary set up to drive my point, I shall
merely begin with this: you, the customer, are in a very precarious
and potentially unhealthy or unpleasant situation waiting to happen.
You see, waiters and bartenders have access to the food and beverages
that you will place into you mouth and allow passage to your gullet.
Retail employees have access to your personal financial information
when you hand them your credit card. Parking lot attendants may watch
over your car just as easily as turning a blind eye. Bank tellers
handle your paycheck and bills and nest eggs. I could go, but i think
I've made my point here.
There is no solidarity among the working class, so just because -for
example-you are a server who goes out to be waited on by another
server this does not mean all is forgiven when you act like a
pretentious and overbearing shit. more than likely, this means you
will either be given visine in your cocktail or -and this is my
favorite- a used or dirty straw. the best revenge after all, is a
subtle and secret revenge.
dear customers worldwide, we bring you your food. your drinks. you
voluntarily give us access to your digestive and immune systems on a
weekly basis and if you think we are unaware of this power, then think
again. Do not believe that a sturdy and pious moral fiber prevents a
serving class individual from exacting a type of payback upon you for
grievous errors in manners and social etiquette. this is not 1758;
there is no such thing as a loyal servant.
one serving job is much like another and therefore we are all at any
given time willing to risk losing the current job in lieu of
physically harming a customer who has crossed the line and for
example: has sexually assaulted us or threatened our lives or just
generally pissed us off. as an aside to kronick: tell me who this guy
PJ is and I'll make sure he drinks smoker's loogies for a long while.
in summation...be nice to your server or checkout person or launderer.
say please and thank you to your gas pump attendant or your hair
stylist or your karaoke coordinator. you'll never know when we've
licked our finger and stuck it in your rib eye or around the rim of
your martini UNLESS you can be certain that you haven't pissed us off.
thank you.
Classic Le Splat Bios
MiaSplat
A chronicle of one small bar/restaurant/sty in one medium sized urban county.
*About Us*
Name:Barbitch
Age:27
Gender:Female
Location:LeSplat, otherwise known as The Mouth of Madness or Gross,
What Did I Just Put My Elbow In?
Likes: Fine Newcastle English Brown Ale, my dogs, accessories, sitting
on my couch, a damn fine cup of coffee, TMBG, syncroncity, vintage
thing(s), not paying for tattoos, joss whedon and comic books
Dislikes: lack of coffee and flavored creamer, the fact that i have no
apointment television shows, exercising, doing the dishes, people who
fail to use turn signals, physical pain (most specifically my own),
lack of accessories
Recently I: Began writing a romance novel in lieu of the great
american novel and realized i suck at writing the sex scenes...
Name:Kronick
Age:40-ish, as in "Ish, I am Forty already?" I want my 20s back.
Gender:Male
Location:LeSplat
Likes: Warm Puppies, Digital Cable, DVR, Red Wine, Ratatoulle, Molson
Canadian, Thrift Shops, French Vanilla Coffee Creamer, Really bad
biographies about very uninteresting people, Natural Body parts,
Melting Stuff.
Dislikes: Unrelated children not related to me, Paying retail, Four
way stops, other people's driving, Weak coffee, Fake accents,
Congestive Heart Failure, the questioning of my credentials, When my
underground lair's sprinkler system goes off - despite no second hand
smoke, Stuff that doesn't melt.
Recently I: Lost one quarter of my body weight in fluid in 8 days.
Papa's Got a Brand New Splat
It started with one, then people found it, then we moved it, then we lost access to it. But since I have started working again at le Splat, I decided to start blogging about it again. I will spork as much as I can form the other incarnations and offer up links. Because they never go away,.
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